Dieting - Friend or Foe.

Over the years I have tried every diet known to man, some extremely unpleasant and others that actually made me put on more weight.

Well known diets such as Weight Watchers and Jenny Craig offer sensible healthy plans that help you lose weight, but they’re expensive. Also what happens once you finish the plan? Do you go cold turkey, because that will probably end with you bathing in a pool of pudding.

During one of my efforts to diet, I was told to restrict my calorie intake to 1,100 a day. In practise I found out that it wasn’t difficult to do this, but just look at the figures. The recommended healthy daily intake for a woman my age is about 2,200 calories, so I was consuming only half of this. The classification of starvation is consuming less than 900 calories a day. Look how close that is! By following this diet I was virtually starving myself, it wasn’t healthy and it wasn’t ever going to work.

Some studies have also shown that crash dieting causes an increase in premature mortality.

Dieting has also been proven to do the opposite than it says on the tin. Dieting can slow down your metabolism by up to 20%. This is your body’s natural response to starvation; it begins to use the small amount of food that you are consuming more efficiently. This means that it is preserving any fat restores in your body, making it more difficult to shift. Because of this increase in efficiency your body won’t need as many calories to function, meaning that once you stop dieting the weight will start piling on.

Don’t even get me started on miracle pills. Raspberry Ketone, Colon Cleanse, Acai Berry...not only do they sound awful but they are massive scams.

Instead of temporarily changing what you eat just so you can look good in that swimsuit, look towards adjusting your lifestyle on a permanent basis.

Don’t worry about paying stupid amounts for a gym membership, walk to work every day rather than taking the car. Buy semi-skimmed or 1% milk rather than whole milk and swap that glass of wine for some water. It all adds up and isn’t even that difficult.

The only way that you are going to lose/keep off the pounds is to build a healthy relationship with food. Don’t completely cut things out, because soon enough you will break and go on a binge. If you are not happy then no amount of dieting or exercise is going to fix your problems.

While I’m writing this I am munching on a piece of Easter Egg, It’s not a horrific amount and yes it may contain more calories than a grape but I don’t want a grape...I want chocolate and to be honest, it's really that simple.

Weight Loss - The Journey Towards The Impossible.

For the next two weeks I am going to focus my blogs around healthy living. It’s something that I’ve tried to do for the last few months but hasn’t been going too well if I’m going to be honest.

Weight Loss. It sounds so easy, just two simple words and yet the reality is so much more complicated. Yes some may be blessed with a fast metabolism - the ability to stay thin no matter how many pies they eat - however like me, most people aren’t. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t jealous of these people, the people who have no idea what it’s like to actually be overweight.

But that’s not right. 

Of course these people know what it’s like. Yes there may be a medical definition of being overweight; however in reality it is different for everyone. Yesterday I weighed myself for the first time since Christmas and according to the NHS ‘BMI Healthy Weight Calculator’, I am perfectly in the middle of the ‘Healthy Weight’ bracket. Part of me appreciates this, I am ‘healthy’, but the rest... I’m not happy.

I look at myself in the mirror and I feel nothing but disgust. My belly sticks out, I have a muffin top, my boobs are too small, my legs are too wobbly, stretch marks galore and I’ve lost count of how many chins I have. 

What I’m trying to get across is that a number on the scales does not mean shit. 

Everyone sees themselves differently and everyone can see flaws in their body image. No amount of healthy eating or exercise or motivation boards will stop this. It may help you feel better about these flaws and may even remove some of them, but it will never erase them all.

Everyone goes on about how the media influences the way we see ourselves, and to some extent it does. I see beautiful actresses plastered across glossy pages every single day, flat stomach’s and not a single stretch mark to be seen. Yeah Photoshop is playing a big part in this but there is more. That celebrity is paying ridiculous amounts of money for a personal trainer to shout at them every day, they might have had surgery or new age treatments to tighten their skin and that’s just it; I cannot access things like that. I can’t afford any of it. Despite their fame they are still human, they still have the same problems as you and I, an obsession with appearance and relentlessly striving for perfection. 

Sorry to disappoint but there is no such thing as perfection. There is no light at the end of the tunnel because the final destination does not exist.

I got my stretch marks during puberty, not through weight gain but through natural growth, they will fade but unfortunately I can’t do anything to get rid of them. I’m trying to get rid of excess fat but it exists in the places where it is hardest to shift. My boobs, well that’s a gene thing (thanks a lot mum) and maybe my chins will be less visible if I smile more.  When I am confident in my own body then I can say that I am happy being imperfect.

Many of you won’t get anything out of this blog post. All I’m trying to say is that it doesn’t matter if you are stick thin or a little bit chubby, visual appearance is only one tiny part of you. You have so much more going for you to matter what other people think. Me, I’m going to be a journalist and couldn’t give a flying fudge about anything people say against me... It’s what I think that matters. At the moment I have a long way to go until I am happy with the way I look, but I hope that it will happen one day.

Don't compare yourself to other people you are you for a reason. If there is such thing as perfection, then your individuality and uniqueness comes the closest to being it. 

I’ll leave you with a rather appropriate quote from the exceptionally beautiful (inside and out) Kate Winslet :)

‘As a young girl, I never felt attractive. I was fat and unhappy at times, and that kind of thinking stays with you your entire life. There's always going to be a part of me that worries about not looking as slim as other actresses. But at a certain point, when you achieve a lot of your goals and you can be proud of your work, you start to relax more about who you are. And that includes your appearance and self-image – I don't think I look too bad for a mother of two. But women shouldn't have to feel the pressure to compare themselves to actresses or models.’ 

Are you a Geek or a Nerd?

I am the first to admit that I have a rather obsessive personality, and I've often considered that I may have a serious problem when it comes to my addiction to certain aspects of popular culture. One thing that I've always juggled with in the back of my rather empty mind is whether I would be classed as a Geek or a Nerd. Normally I am not one to address rather menial 'high school style' labeling, however It frustrates me when people use the terms Geek and Nerd interchangeably, when they each clearly embody different characteristics.

A Geek is someone who is enthusiastic about a particular topic or field. They generally are obsessed about anything to do with their chosen subject, collecting the latest memorabilia and informing themselves about the most specific and minute details that is has to offer.
A Nerd differs in the that they tend to be more academic, relying on fact and pursuits of the mind rather than delving into unnecessary trivia.

Another way to differentiate between the two would be that Geeks are usually fans of their chosen subject and Nerds practise theirs. A stereotypical Geek therefore can probably spend hours scouring the internet for spoilers for their latest show, whereas a Nerd is probably spending his/her time more productively and actually achieving something.

In terms of personality traits and how they spend their time, Geeks and Nerds could not be more different. Geeks, due to their enthusiasm and need to indulge in their interests, tend to choose careers or hobbies that exist in a more creative realm (writer's, artist's, graphic designers).
Nerds, as mentioned before tend to be more intellectually orientated, and so it's no wonder that they usually choose to spend their time programming computers, constructing scientific theories and building calculators...

I don't think that either Geeks or Nerds are particularly sociable however I think that in a social context they do behave quite differently. Out of the two, Geeks are more likely to talk about their interests, especially if they find someone who shares them. They may be oblivious to the fact that  others may not share their enthusiasm, and are likely to strongly defend their beloved subject if something is said against it. Nerds on the other hand, are definitely more introverted as they are probably aware that very few people are aware of the usage of binary code.

Although these classifications are not exclusive they do offer relevant insight. I could go on but as I was writing this, I became more and more sure that I am a Geek, although I do have a few nerdy features. I mainly obsess over TV shows such as Sherlock, Doctor Who and Supernatural, I have written copious amounts of fan fiction associated with each  and I collect more memorabilia than my bank account can handle. I once had a conversation with myself only using quotes from these three shows, and if you dare say anything bad against them I am likely to get very, very angry.

If you are confused about whether you are a Geek or a Nerd then my consulting hours are between 10 and 12 on weekends :)

The not so midlife crisis.

Ok. First thing's first, I must apologise for being so lazy with my blogging. A lot has happened in the last two months, not all worth sharing but enough to stop me delving into cyberspace. 

Recently I have been under a lot of stress, exam preparation, assignment deadlines, overwhelming debt and drowning in my total lack of self worth. 

It's been tough, but I've tried to deal with it as best I can :) 

Basically I'm going through my midlife crisis at least fifteen years early. I've been doubting my future in every single way possible and it's not been good. 

To help myself sort my sorry life out, I decided to resort to list making...the only thing that I am actually good at. 

I turn 20 in September and so I decided to make a 'Thirty things to do before 30' list. 

It's not very imaginative, but it's made up of things I really want to do.

And so here it is:

1) Publish an ebook - I've written so much fanfic in my time but I desperately want to write a piece of original fiction. It's very unlikely that I will be able to publish a print book (although it would be cool to frame my rejection letter). 

2) Travel around the USA - I've already got my route planned... I need to somehow gather the funds.

3) Get a full time job and love it - obviously this is a utopian ideal, but hey a girl's gotta dream. 

4) Run a marathon - I've always wanted to run the London marathon, but I doubt this one will happen...I'm way too fat. 

5) Get a tattoo - I've been so close to getting one of these for years, this is another one where money (or lack of it) comes into play.

6) Complete a five year journal - I have never completed a diary in my life, but recently one of my lovely friends bought me a beautiful five year journal... And I will finish this one!! 

7) Reach my perfect healthy weight and keep it off - I need to lose about two stone and keep it off before I'm totally happy with my weight. 

8) Graduate from university - If I don't complete my degree then my entire life goes to pot...so this is more of a must...

9) Take a spontaneous trip - I am one of those people that need to strategically plan everything that I do. One day I just want to spin a globe and blindly choose a  country and fly there within a day...it's crazy and makes me feel slightly sick even thinking about it to be honest. 

10) Leave home - obviously I can't do this until I earn enough in my dream job so we're probably looking at five years at least.

11) Learn another language - I know a little French and Portuguese but not enough to hold a conversation... Fun fact though, I can write almost fluently in Elvish ;) 

12) Watch the sun rise and set on the beach - this is a bit of a soppy one but it's something that seems cool. 

13) Complete a work placement abroad - I've always wanted to work in another country, hopefully one day that opportunity will present itself. 

14) Record a podcast - I've previously said on this site that I would do this...I still haven't :/

15) Go to Comic Con - this actually ties in with #2. 

16) Publish an article in a print magazine - funny thing is, I've already done this one but I want to do it again. 

17) Take my family on holiday - They've taken me on holiday countless times, I should one day repay the favour. 

18) Have a dress designed for me - let's be fair, this is just a crappy one to fill the gap. 

19) Get married - this one is very questionable. 

20) Keep to an exercise routine for a year - lol this is probably even more unlikely than #19.

21) Volunteer for a charity - I have done this once but next time I want to make more of an impact.

22) Go on a Ghost Tour - I'll only do this if someone else comes with me.

23) Throw/attend a Harry Potter marathon party - I don't know why... But I  want to. 

24) Learn to play an instrument - An extra skill...no other reason. 

25) Save baby turtles - Turtles are my favourite animals and I have never cried as much as when I watched baby turtles get picked off by birds on a David Attenborough documentary... I also despise birds and so this is my mission. 

26) fly first class - I like personal space, first class means that it is acceptable for me not to talk to people. 

27) Play the Sherlock drinking game - I'm actually not a huge fan of drinking, but I love Sherlock and therefore this is automatically awesome. 

28) Attempt to confront phobias - there are quite a few things that I am absolutely terrified of, and to be honest I'm quite embarrassed of them. 

29) Have a baby/ buy a kitten - it may seem strange that I have put these both in the same category but I'm going to share something. Children annoy me and I'm actually scared of newborn babies, also the thought of giving birth both terrifies me and disgusts me. So it's either a baby or a kitten, because to be honest I love my cat Indie more than any human being. 

30) Write a letter to my 30 year old self containing this list - I will open this letter on my 30th birthday and hopefully I will reassure myself that in the end everything will be ok.

So there it is, and I'm really hoping that I can start ticking some of these off soon!